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"Live" at Hugo House

by Sad13

subscriber exclusive
1.
F2 04:07
Stalled in a sports car off the road. Deadbeat in the passenger seat calls a tow to the next town over. In the red, I start to show that love means borrow. Bite at the edges and swallow. Some wild horses could drag you away without a command to stop 'em. Settle the stomach by running your mouth. Emptiness fills like a promise. Setting the record, arranging your fate. Spurs on the saddle don't mean that you're safe from nothing when nothing can change here. Good for nothing only breaks bread to bargain in a tongue I understand. White heat in the back of a cab can't spin away from the crash. Bag the scraps, we're in the black. Bite, swallow. Begging and stealing to follow. Good for nothing came for one thing. Some wild horses could drag you away without a command to stop 'em. Settle the stomach by running your mouth. Emptiness fills like a promise. Setting the record, arranging your fate. Spur on what's coming, get you on your way. Go toward the vanishing point that awaits. The view doesn't change that nothing is coming up fast.
2.
Balance the second value to the first. Checking in crabgrass, savings in a hearse for two who climb to a mountaintop diner off the skyway, licking clean the plates, watering down lemonade. Just like hellbent racketeers who need to stretch it out another year. But if you seek me here that'd be a mistake. Separate and look away from me since we split on the state line. Extra mouth to feed doesn't matter much to me. I learned how to flee when the grip's tight. At the grocery, forcing me to pocket things for you. I don't in my new life. Here in my new life. A disappearing act is tough to follow. Once hanging on your word now hanging low. Pulling the mortar from pestle and phoning a friend then phoning it in. Wednesday was always pasta from a can, a feast for me then. And now I wake up in the van, wonder where I am, lay back down til 1 pm. Grasping onto the backseat, devils in the incomplete. But make no mistake, separate is the only way, pulling off to sleep on the state line. Bittersweet or sweet doesn't matter much to me. I learned how to leave in the twilight. At the Mom & Pop, ringing up a crowded cart echoes like a bell in my new life. Here in my new life. Phoning it in, then asking a friend: was it a mistake, failing up to outer space? Option B: a sinkhole to calamity and its memories, on a shoestring, tangling. I know you, Consolation #2. The only prize I need's a happy anniversary. Stretch it out another year, I'm here in my new life.
3.
The Crow 03:19

about

These first two songs, "F2" & "Neverthriving" were written and recorded for Hugo House's 2021 Literary Series ft. Ottessa Moshfegh, Leni Zumas and Laura Da'. The series is themed around apocalypse this year and the first installment was "Famine" - the black horse.

The third song is an "encore" version of "The Crow" from Haunted Painting (2020).

credits

released December 31, 1999

Written, performed & mixed by Sadie Dupuis. Thank you to Hugo House for commissioning these first two pieces.

"F2" was made almost entirely (apart from guitar and vocals) with the ES2 synth in honor of SOPHIE. Additional thank you to Novo Guitars and Soyuz mics, I play a Voltur on this and sing through an 017.

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about

Sad13 Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

sad13 is a cyborg dog astrally projected from the recent past to save the middle school dance. sadie dupuis is sad13.

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